• Arielle Williford

Why I Disappeared

I am going to go more in-depth with my blog than I did in the video.

So, My husband and I had a crazy Spring and Summer. We received an email about a little boy whose birth mom chose us to parent her unborn baby in the beginning of April. We were matched with a 16 year old girl who had a supportive family. They supported all of her decisions. Jaron and I started spending all of our extra time putting together a nursery, buying cute little boy stuff, crafting things for his room, figuring out how we would go to camp or not go to camp.

Jaron and I went to Youth Camp for the first 3 days and then we switched with 2 youth parents. We had one of our college students go and stay all week and help with the process of changing chaperones.

Our birth mom was induced on the Friday night of Youth Camp. 2 days later we took our little boy home. My parents were there and Jaron's parents came up to see him! It was a sweet time. BUT, after 2 days our sweet birth mom decided she couldn't do it and wanted to parent him. My husband and I had to drive 2 hours to take him back to the adoption agency. It was one of the hardest days of our life...

When we arrived home my mom had cleaned everything and put all the baby stuff in the nursery and closed the door. We cried ourselves to sleep, contacted some friends and some contacted us. We were able to leave and drive to the beach. My Aunt took some time just caring for Jaron and I. About 25 years ago she lost a baby right before she was to be induced. She told me something that stuck with me. She said that she believed through her process that God impressed on her that He would not give her a baby to hold if He was not going to give her a baby forever. That changed my whole outlook.

We spent a few days with my aunt just feeding us and helping us heal. We were able to spend time on a private beach with just us and our dog. We then went and spent a few days at friends beach house where we ate delicious food and spent some time discussing if we even wanted to continue this journey of adoption.

We left to drive home on Father's Day. We skipped church and listened to some podcasts and decided to continue our adoption journey.

Fast forward to Thursday of that week. I had taken my mother-in-law to her cancer treatment and was on the way home talking to my friend when I received a text message about an email. I pulled into a gas station and read the e-mail out loud to my friend. A baby girl had been born on Father's Day. She weighed 7lbs 4oz and needed a forever family. Our adoption agency had decided to offer the little girl to the family that had been waiting the longest. That was not my husband and I. Instead, we were the 3rd family waiting. Surprisingly, the first two families backed out and we were ready! Our social worker was wonderful and decided to wait until the 11th day to let us come get her. In the state of VA a mother has 10 days to change her mind. Our daughter's birth mom checked herself out of the hospital just 3 hours after giving birth. She came back and made an adoption plan the next day. What a strong lady! She had a traumatic birthing process with forceps and a vacuum, which led to my daughters broken collarbone. This strong lady still decided to make this choice for our daughter.

We brought our daughter home a week to the day that we learned about her. She is such a joy!

People told us once we adopted a baby our lives would change. They were right, but also very wrong. Our daughter has been to 10 volleyball games and 3 football games. She is loved by our community, our church, and our students. When we sit at games our daughter is held by parents and students. They love on her. They tell her how much she is loved.

We were eating lunch one Sunday at the local deli and our daughter was being passed around like usual by our church members. After our church members left (they paid for our lunch) an older lady came up to me and told me about how her and her husband had adopted. Her husband was a Pastor. They adopted a baby, who they later found out was hispanic and african american, 40 years ago. The lady began to tell me how her and her husband were blessed by seeing elderly people love on our daughter and how they wished their daughter had been accepted like ours. They were almost in tears. They saw the church being the church. I pray our daughter will continue to break boundaries and show everyone how the church really is!

So, that is where we are and you are up to date!

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